Decorating

We've been living here in our 'new' house since June 2003 and we're still working on the decorating. We had a painting party once and we got through painting the living room and some of the kitchen. Now I want to change the colors. Right now some walls are half yellowish cream and others are sort of a light brick red. My husband is leaning towards a tan or brownish color. It doesn't matter to me anymore I just want it changed. We have some oversized couches that are a dark red and there's a rug under the coffee table (we don't drink coffee) that has gold, dark red, dark green, and brown in it. The tiles are stone-like and have faded pink / grey / blue colors in it. A girlfriend of mine does interior design as a hobby and her place looks great, but we can't afford to hire her just yet. Another girlfriend of mine (read: purfiktgurl) should be helping but she lives too far. This is our brokest christmas season ever so whatever I do to spice up the place has to be cheap (okay, inexspensive). At the home show a couple months ago I bought six little bamboo shoot trees and put them in the kitchen above the cabinets. In between them I put one piece of something (a decorative kettle, a wire candle-holder in the form of a girl holding two candles, and some others things I can't remember). I have two pictures that a friend of mine in Jamaica bought for me that I want to put so I bought some picture hanging nails. But, I can't put up the pictures til we decide what we want to do with the walls in the kitchen. We've been looking for a wallpaper border to put around the top but haven't seen any we like. We may have to settle for painting all the way to the ceiling but who's willing to go up there?

I feel restless like I'm not getting anything done. Our businesses feel like they're extremely slow to start, I'm moving like a snail at work, and I'm dissatisfied with my home surroundings.

We keep dumping money into our businesses and we haven't seen dime one of a return yet - the properties in Jacksonville are still sucking us dry even though one of them has tenants, we bought two cars from an auction neither of which are completely fixed and can't be sold anyway until my husband gets his car dealership license, our online stores are not online yet (nowhere near it).

Hardly anyone is at work so it's pretty quiet. I have work to do but no unction to get it done. I know next week the burners will be on high because we have a deadline to meet and that should be motivation enough...but it's not.

I already complained about my house. Everytime I clean one area and move on to the next, the first one is messed up again. How aggravating.

I know it sounds like I'm dumping, but I'm not really because there's so much more good in my life than not.

...continued

When I first saw the report of the tsunami, the death toll was 7000. Now it is 52000 and still expected to rise. I can almost feel the pain of the parents who lost children. I hear and read the stories and I don't know how to deal with it. Had I been through that experience I would be crazy by now. How difficult it must be for them cannot even be expressed in words. The pictures tell it all. My prayers go out to the survivors.

This was a bad year

"An earthquake of epic power struck deep beneath the Indian Ocean on Sunday, unleashing 20-foot walls of water that came crashing down on beaches in seven Asian countries across thousands of miles, smashing seaside resorts and villages and leaving nearly 10,000 dead in their wake." (Article)

Just a few months ago hurricanes barreled across the Caribbean. Terrorist attacks, war in the middle east, genocide in Sudan, deadly typhoon ravages Japan, massacres (i.e. in Honduras last week), killing sprees....

God said it would be chaotic before he returned. How much worse will it get and will we be ready?

December 25th

Seasons Greetings!
Happy Holidays!
Happy Hanukah!
Merry Christmas!
Happy Kwanzaa!

As we remember Christ born in a manger, let us even more ponder His death and resurrection. He didn't die to be remembered as a babe, but He was born to die to redeem us to Himself. As we give and recieve, think on the ultimate gift of life and the Giver. How can we give to Him daily?

'meme'

Inspired by purfiktgurl.
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
* Shelly, Shell, Baby (only K calls me that though)

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
* queensr, qscrose, shellyp

THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
* I believe in God; I love; I look cute sometimes

THREE THINGS YOU HATE/DISLIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
* I'm indecisive; I can't keep a clean enough house; I lack creativity (unlike purfiktgurl)

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
* east indian (as in India); 'eurasian'; caribbean black (Grenada & Jamaica)

HREE TWO THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
* dying and leaving my family; that God will come and not accept me

THREE FIVE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
* wear clean underwear; cell phone; license; credit card, car keys

THREE TWO THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
* faded baby blue work short worn as a pajama top; grey sweats worn as pajama bottoms

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS (or artists(at the moment)):
* Sean Paul, Beyonce, Alicia Keys

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
* "My, Myself, and I" is the only one I can remember

THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS
* have a second child (I've never had a second child before); visit Japan, running a successful home-based business

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP (love is a given):
* mutual service to God; fun; encouragement

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE
* I love my husband, my son, chocolate and strawberries; B should not have been re-elected; racism does not exist

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX (or same) THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
* eyes; muscles (like my husbands); height

THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN’T DO:
* the splits; be perfect; not love my son and/or my husband

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
* hanging with my son and husband; reading; figuring out what needs to be done next

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
* n/a; n/a; n/a

THREE CAREERS YOU’RE CONSIDERING:
* stay-at-home mom; modeling agent; world traveler

THREE FOUR PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
* Hawaii; Australia; Venice

THREE KID’S NAMES
* Sidney (of course); Shai (maybe); can't think of a third

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
* anything my kid(s) would be proud of; live without (anymore) regrets; please God

VitaMix etc.

Remember the VitaMix machine we bought? We have (read 'K' has) been using it. He's been experimenting. It's only been about a week and he's getting better. He made carrot soup a couple of times. He first try at ice cream didn't go so well. The fruit smoothies are alright. My favorite is the carrot soup.

My sister was down for the weekend. She's broke as usual. This time I'm broke too so I can't even help her. She still made out like a bandit though - our mother gave her her old computer, bought a new printer, and gave her her old digital camera, plus some food from her pantry. Her dad, well, we don't need to discuss him here because it wouldn't be pretty.

Not much going on at work. We're winding down for the holidays. I want to carry over what little vacation I have left so I'll be working just about every day except the federal holidays. Not cool. I can't wait til our businesses start to pick up and I can take a vacation anytime I want, with or without pay.

I've been wasting time thinking about how much time is spent wasting time thinking. It seems like it's a lot. I want to be the kind of person who makes decisions, not just one who analyzes every minute detail and then misses the window. I was reading lousywithvirginity and in one of her posts the author wrote, "paralysis by analysis is the opposite of being productive." I agree.

Mortality

What is man that God should be mindful of him? As I hear of people dying I am forced to consider my own mortality and whether or not I am ready to leave this world. If heaven is perfect why are we afraid to leave earth now? Do we really believe in God and eternity with Him? I so want to believe and be saved when He returns, and I want my loved ones to be saved also. But there's this selfish part of me that wants to watch my son grow up and have a family of his own; a side that wants to grow old with my husband; a side that wants to accomplish much in this life. But all of this is to what end? This imperfect world should hold nothing for the believer.

I must be stressed lately. All my symptoms point to it. I don't feel stressed. But when I try to sleep and it feels like my heart is fibrillating I wonder if it really is stress or something out of my control. And then I stress myself out considering the possibilities. Hence my mind wanders to my mortality. And it becomes a vicious cycle of stress-symptoms-more stress-more symptoms....

I thank God every morning that I wake up.

Pregnancy

No, I'm not pregnant. God-willing I will be this year though. I would love to have three or four children of my own, but I know it's not feasible right now. By the time we might be able to afford them I'll probably be way too old anyway. Between my husband and myself we already have three children, and it's not a financial breeze to take care of them. But I'm still trying for at least one more.

A girlfriend of mine is pregnant and she looks really good - better than I did. :) From the back you would never even know she was expecting. I took her to a photographer last night to have pictures taken of her in her glory. She only has four more weeks to go (I doubt she'll make two) so she's ready to pop. The photographer was really good. He has such an artistic eye - he made her look like a model. These pictures are my gift to her. Yes, I already bought diapers and a mobile for the baby. But these pictures are for her. She brought about three outfits and I we took pictures for almost two hours (144 pix)! I enjoyed it, I hope she did. I know the photographer did - he was having such a good time. I can't wait to see the final product.

What's Going On

Life's been pretty busy. Ok, that's the norm for me, but really.

* I want to get Sidney into modeling
* We're 'managing' three properties in Jacksonville
* K wants to buy / sell cars and parts (incl. engines)
* We're trying the online mall thing

For each of these we'll eventually be setting up a business. Sidney's modeling is the only exception. It depends on how it goes and if I like it enough to start up my own agency. I've been seriously been considering it. I would specialize in boys from birth to age 17. I don't want to deal with the girls - as a Christian I foresee too many conflicts. But, who knows.

As for the properties, I can't wait to get rid of them. Evicting tenants is not fun in the least. I'll stick with buying land.

Speaking of cars, we're planning to go to Japan in a few months...more on that later.

The online mall, well, we have some storefronts to populate. We do have some ideas for products (pillows, candles, jerked meat and seasoning, car accessories, airplanes). K has a contact who sells airplanes in case anyone's interested.

Aggravation via Good Intentions

This morning I woke up late. I'll admit, I was up til 2 am watching the movie, "The Librarian," but still. I set my alarm for about 7 am and of course I didn't actually turn it on. My loving husband didn't wake me either. He was up for an hour and he didn't wake me up - til 10 am! He has this thing about waking me up - he doesn't like to do it. He figures if I'm sleeping I'm tired so he lets me sleep. If I fall asleep earlier than normal in the evening he won't even wake me to brush my teeth or pray or anything. Me, on the other hand, I wake his behind up. And I always tell him to wake me. As a matter of fact I told him last night that I have two meetings at work today. He didn't remember. And I wouldn't expect him to, but if he would just wake me UP; that's all I ask.

The only good thing that came of the day is that I spent more money. Woo-hoo! Went to doctor (me and jr). That comes with a price tag of $20 for the co-pays, then signed up to have my company incorporated in Nevada. That price is more than I'm willing to admit in writing yet. Especially considering all of the other money I (we) have put out in the past three months.

I was looking through the mailers we got today and I had to save the Movado insert to show my husband. Too many pretty watches. Too much money.

Madama Butterfly

Finally ready for bed. Went to see my first opera tonight. Some co-workers decided they wanted to go and I figured what better opportunity. So, of course, I dragged along my husband. It's been a long, hectic day. Got up at 5:45 (am!), got to work by 7:00, got home about 5:30, rushed around and almost got locked out of the first scene of the show. It started at 8:00. We got there at 7:20 but we were so hungry we had to go find something to eat. We rushed the poor waitress, scarfed down our food and practically ran back to the center, up to the balcony via the elevator and into the darkening auditorium. We really just made it. Glad we went though. It would have been better if we had time to socialize beforehand, but the show itself was quite good. I've been to muscials before and this was similar. The difficult part was trying to read the english translation on the screen above performers and trying to watch the performers at the same time. Anyway, I'm off to bed now. G'night.

Today

One of our founding members will be leaving us in a few weeks. What a surprise! Well, we knew it was coming sooner or later, we just hoped it was later than sooner. She's been with the company for 17 years! She's all we know and now she's leaving. I'm sad - for us, and kinda sad for her too. We'll have to start over with someone new and she'll have to start over getting to know other people and learning their company culture / politics. At least here she knew the evils she had to deal with. We've had lots of changes this year and many more are coming. "With change comes opportunity."