Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Is that so wrong?

SP and I sort of share a mutual friend. I say "sort of" because this friend is much more SP's than she is mine. But anyway, this friend is having a going-away get-together. I plan on attending but I can't afford a going-away gift. Tell me: do I have to buy something in order to be welcome?? When I told SP I wasn't bringing a gift, she looked at me like I was crazy. But I'm not kidding. A card I can do but that's about it. I tend to be quite a generous person. My friends know that. I'm frugal, but I when I have some dollars I spread the wealth. I would expect that my friends also understand that if I can't give, it doesn't mean I've switched to being cheap, it just that I don't have the means.

Regardless, should I not go or will a card suffice?

6 comments:

Aziza said...

It really depends on the friends involved and how they perceive things. If the person is going to get upset about not receiving a gift, I guess shying away from attending the party would be understandable.

As for me, I would want all of my friends to attend my party whether they come bearing gifts or not. I understand some of my friends' circustances. Plus, I feel like the Lord has blessed me with so much that I don't feel comfortable excluding people.

Aziza said...

Oops. Please excuse my typo. I hate my typos. I really meant to type the word "circumstances."

Diggs said...

I would say that a card would suffice, b/c if I were the mutual friend, I would simply appreciate that u came. But then again, it DOES depend on the people ure dealing with here.

SP said...

I was just teasing you. You don't have to get her anything. She doesn't expect anything nor will she turn you away for coming empty handed. She doesn't even need a card. Just come. I wasn't going to get her a going away present. I am only bringing something because her birthday is the 20th and she always gets me stuff for my birthday.

WIP said...

I opted not to go to a baby shower several years ago (immediate - post-college) because I was jobless, therefore moneyless. Later on, when the friend wondered why I didn't show, she was sadden because she said that we were better than that and she was sorry I missed it. It was me who had the problem of being presentless. I still don't like showing up empty-handed, but it depends on "who" the person is. I'm only assuming I get invited because the person feels as though I'm a friend (I don't have a lot of casual relationships). Friends understand hard times. I now go held held at least half-mast *LOL* with or w/o bearing gifts. I think it's enough to think of them to attend, make arrangements to have the family taken care of while mommy is away, and join in the festivities. That means you did go through the effort and the friend is worth it. Much more than some monetary gift showing.

Boy, have I made a plight for "us" poor?

mordigirl said...

Just go!!! your friend if she is one will want you not your present.... If you find you really need to give something give her a beautiful gift certifcate with a job you will do for her eg. Massage for 1 Hr
Hair and Nails etc etc. Monetary cost 0. Time together Immesurable..Have a lovely time